Hello, My Name is BRIDE

A few days ago, the boy informed me that he had an idea for our wedding. In order to humor him, I asked him to tell me about it, at which point I tuned him out and started thinking about more important things, like how long it would be before Britney got herself committed again (evidently not very long).

These profound thoughts came to a screeching halt when somewhere in the very small part of my brain that was still scanning his monologue for appropriate times to nod and say "uh huh," I realized that he had just said "name tags." Name Tags? I started listening again until I finally comprehended that the idea he was proposing included making our reception guests wear little sticky name tags. The kind that say "Hello my name is..." The kind that people think are funny to fill in with things like "drunk" or "stupid" or something else really clever and original that no one else has ever thought of before.

"Just think of how useful it will be," the boy said, nodding enthusiastically. " You won't have any trouble remembering the names of my 57 first cousins." Like that was ever a problem. I scanned the boy's face for any telltale sign that he was joking. Nope. Not a joke.

Later on, we decided to pick out food that we wanted to try at the taste testing in order to decide on a menu.... the boy flipped through the options and then asked where the pigs-in-a-blanket were on the list of choices. I laughed, thinking that maybe this time he was joking.... wrong again.

I began to imagine what my wedding pictures would look like if the boy was allowed to plan the wedding on his own...... I would be the one in the white dress, holding a plate of pigs-in-a-blanket and wearing a sticker that said, "Hello my name is BRIDE," while distant relatives named "Drunk" and "Stupid" danced in the background.

If, by some very microscopically tiny chance, the boy does get his way, I think that I would want something a little more creative than BRIDE to put on my name tag.

Right now I'm considering:










But I'm open to suggestions.